Call me CRAY-ZEE!

Some of y'all might think I'm CRAZY after reading this post, but it's the truth!  Okay?  Deal with it!  :P

With a lot of bloggy friends have SECOND babies...I can officially say that I have baby fever.  Not just because they are having babies, but I feel like Ryder is growing up too fast & getting too old & he "needs" a sibling to be close in age.  

One problem.  No hubby.  No potential hubby.  That's a pretty large problem to have.

But...I want to remember feeling the way I do now, when everything is in place for me to become a mommy again!  =)

As much as I say I want another baby, I think I mainly want another because of Ryder.  I want them to be close in age.  Brother or sister.  But then when I really think about having to take care of TWO...I freak out & change my mind.  Probably because I take care of ONE by myself.  I think my mind automatically thinks of taking care of TWO by myself, even though that's not actually how it's going to be.  

I also find myself thinking that the next one will hopefully & probably be a breeze (even more so than Ryder) because since he was 4 months old, I've taken care of him on my own.  I don't even really know what it's like to "share" the responsible in the house hold with a toddler.  

Kind people offer to help me at restaurants for example when they see me juggling a high chair creased in my elbow with a tray full of food in my hand, a backpack on my back, & a toddler on my hip...but probably sounding very rude, I say, "Oh...I think I got it.  Thank you though."  I truly do mean that.  I do have it. I do it all the time.  I have learned to do things this way.  It's not that I think I'm too good to have help, but it's just easier to do it on my own sometimes (key word...sometimes).  

Even though I have a lot of things I need to accomplish first before welcoming another baby into the world, I can dream right?  Hopefully one day it will come true, & I will be able to provide Ryder with a sibling.  I can only imagine his joy & excitement in having a little brother or sister.  I want to be able to provide that for him!

Bloggy friend Mama Laughlin, announced a few weeks ago she is expecting #2!  I couldn't be happier for her & her hubby, but with her first child, Tucker & Ryder being born on the SAME day...I feel like I'm behind!  :P  They are shooting for an 11-11-11 baby to follow in Big T's footsteps of 9-9-09!  ;)

Everyone has different timings for having children in their lives, so that's what I have to keep telling myself!  Whenever I do have another baby & a sibling for Ryder, that will be the perfect & right time for me.  For us.  

Any who...you can say I'm jealous or just a pathetic single mom who LOVES being a Mommy!  It's not that I'm not fully satisfied & happy with my sweet boy, but I want to share that bond with another sweet muchin'!  Yes..I'm only 21, so I have time...but...you get what I'm sayin'!

& just for kicks...the cute little items I saw on recent shopping trips did NOT help!!  &...it's mostly girl stuff!  :O  Since Ryder I have always said I am SOOOO glad he is a boy!  I don't know why...but I've also always thought I would be so happy being a mom to just boys, but from the looks of these ADORABLE clothes, I probably wouldn't mind having a little girl to dress up!  :P

 {I almost CRIED when I saw this!!}

 {romper!}